Homework for #SisU2012: What Happens in a World Without Obstacles?

By Kathy Korman Frey

Participants in the the award-winning Hot Mommas Project Sisterhood of Success (SisU) Academy got a homework assignment today.

Dr. Phil Dembo!

It is is inspired by a familiar fairy tale-slash-nightmare I will also talk about on Dr. Phil Dembo‘s radio show tonight. (Access @LATalkRadio. Access the recording).

Out of it came a great exercise that changed the way I looked at self-limiting behavior.

You know the story….we all have one…

 Once upon a time…

I was sitting around with a group of venture capitalists and other high ranking executives (insert your intimidating group here_______).

PAUSE....So first, let’s test ourselves here:


Q: Who did you imagine these “venture capitalists and high-ranking executive” people to be?

A: They were all women. Just making sure we’ve got the same mental picture here, JIC.



Let’s continue…..So, we had to write down a goal for our business, or ourselves, on a card.

Easy, right?

Then came the doozy.

“Flip it over,” the dinner host said, “And write down the number one challenge getting in your way from accomplishing that goal.”

I never really thought about it that way. I always just kept chugging along, like the Little Engine that Could.

But, now that she had said it like that…

“MONEY,” I wrote down.

I had always been extremely financially conservative. I can’t LOOK at a car without thinking “depreciating asset.” I know.

We went around the table. I said it out loud.

“But, we’d invest in you! What’s the problem?”

And then, I really thought about it. What WAS the problem? Had I literally created this problem? It was sort of a fascinating moment.

It was beyond Ah-ha…to “H*LL YEAH!”

I thought, “Awesome…here are all these things I could do!”

So now, you try….

#1a. Think of a goal that you’d like to accomplish over the next 6 months to 1 year. It could be personal or professional. It should be something you’d be proud of yourself for accomplishing.

#1b.  What is the #1 thing getting in the way of your accomplishing this goal?

#2. Now – remove that challenge from your field of vision. That’s right, literally pretend it’s not there. Enter the world of make believe. From “you’ve hired a wife” (this is literally a joke, and no, is not a ploy to attract weird mail order bride dudes to this blog)…to “you’ve become independently wealthy” – whatever it takes….




See if your goal CHANGES at all.

Does it become BIGGER?

Does it stay the SAME?



More on Saturday #SisU2012….or, to jump in RIGHT NOW…comment below.

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